题目是：作为一个团体的成员要比当领导好，同意否？

There is a general discussion today about it is better to be a member of a group or the leader of a group. Those who choose to be a member of a group argue that they do not have too much pressure than the leader, while on the other hand, some people prefer to be a leader because they want to lead the other people. As far as I am concerned, to be a member of a group is always better than a leader. The following essay will demonstrate my points.
For one thing, being a member of a group can make more friends than a leader because people always feel nervous when they with a leader. My friend Joe, for example, when he first joined a support group as a member in his college, he made lots of friends from the group. They went shopping together, had dinner with people from different academies and helped each other with their reports. But when he became a leader of the group, he found that he lost those friends because they do not want to be friends with a leader who always orders them.. So Joe can only goes shopping by himself and does all the reports by his own.
For another thing, to be a member of a group can learn the team spirit better than a leader, because you have more friends and you can get help from lots of people. You can learn a lot from these people and never worried about making mistakes because they are all ready to help you. I still remember when I entered the university as a freshman and I joined a math group. But actually, I am not so good at math that I always made mistakes. Fortunately, I had friends in the group, they helped me with the problems and let me realized the essence of team spirit. From that time on, I chose to be a member every time I took part in a group.
But every coin has two sides. Being a leader of a group may have more pressure, do more works than others and have to take response to every tiny thing. But it also let you learn more and know how to pay attention to all things while focus on doing the most crucial thing, doesn’t it?
From what have been discussed above, we may safely come to the conclusion that to be a member of a group is always better than a leader because there is less pressure and more friends, although being a leader can practice your abilities more.


之前写都是慢慢斟酌，后来发现这样不行，于是硬是逼自己在半小时内写完这篇，我自己也没去看语法错误啊什么的，就直接拿上来给大家拍吧
你们拍得越多我越高兴````希望不吝赐教啊！！

请看http://www.xiaomaguohe.net/bbs/thread-3521-1-1.html

好吧```我看了TRISTA和小蹲儿的作文了，也点评了```

There is a general discussion today about it is better to be a member of a group or the leader of a group. Those who choose to be a member of a group argue that they do not have too much pressure than the leader, while on the other hand, some people prefer to be a leader because they want to lead (跟前面的leader有重复 ，建议改成be the head of,或者换一个词性相同的近义词，比如commmand)the other people. As far as I am concerned, to be a member of a group is always better than a leader. The following essay will demonstrate my points.
For one thing, being a member of a group can make more friends（主语错误，你要表达的主语是人，而这句话的主语是being a member of a group,建议在can前面加one并且在being前面加when) than a leader because people always feel nervous when they with a leader(重复出现很多次leader，建议找同义替换，比如可以写chief,boss等等）. My friend Joe, for example, when he first joined a support group as a member in his college, he made lots of friends from the group. They went shopping together, had dinner with people from different academies and helped each other with their reports. But when he became a（改为the)  leader of the group, he found that he lost those friends because they do not want to be friends with a leader who always orders them(前后时态不同）.. So Joe can only goes shopping by himself and does all the reports by his own.（on his own)
For another thing, to be a member of a group can learn the team spirit better than a leader(跟上一句同样错误）, because you have more friends and you can get help from lots of people. You can learn a lot from these people and never worried about making mistakes because they are all ready to help you. I still remember when I entered the university as a freshman and I joined a math group. But actually, I am（was)  not so good at math that I always made mistakes. Fortunately, I had friends in the group, they helped me with the problems and let me realized(realise) the essence of team spirit(spirits). From that time on, I chose to be a member every time I took part in a group.
But every coin has two sides. Being a leader of a group may have more pressure, do more works than others and have to take response to every tiny thing. But it also let you learn more and know how to pay attention to all things while focus (focusing) on doing the most crucial thing, doesn’t it?
From what have(has) been discussed above, we may safely come to the conclusion that to be a member of a group is always better than a leader because there is less pressure and (but) more friends, although being a leader can practice your abilities more.



[ 本帖最后由 whereiswc 于 2007-9-22 17:58 编辑 ]

感觉第一个理由和第二个有点重合

LZ应该想个更好的理由

汗颜中````果然是有了速度就没质量了,那么多的低级错误````天啊,半个小时哪够写嘛```

不用太在意语法错误，只要不至于影响阅读，一点语法错误也是没关系的
不过本人水平有限，也只能找点语法上的错误了，呵呵

我数了下，12个错的```老师给的5分作文都有18处错```我觉得基本上把想说的意思表达清楚就可以了，语法只要不错的让人看不懂就行```