这两天也上来拍了拍牛人的作品,发现自己差的太远,但是下个月就要考试了,希望各位XDJM给我狠狠的拍拍

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising can tell you a lot about a country. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

                       
    With the economical developing the bussiness advertisment  can not be less in our life,we can see the variaties of advertisments in TY or any media,advertisment take us more conveniece also tell us a lot about a country,we can reliase culture ,history and another konwledge form that
    It is well konwn to us that adverstiment is very less in past 10 years,also there a few female in the advertisment,similarely imporssibale to dress exporsure cloth in the screen,however to our surprise that we can see more and more female in the advertisment and derss exposure clothing or mini skirt to make show nowdays,just show the product of the company,they can make vairies poses to attrack you to believe that,from the phenomeno it can be seen that the princple of person are changing,aslo the concept of entiral society are changed.there will be more changes of advertisment in furture with the developing of country
   Not only this espect of advertisment,but the kind of advertisment also can tell us a lot about sisuation of country,compare china to european and USA,there is a lot of medicine advertisment in china however a few these advertisment in european and usa,it can provide that the law in china should be change and be protected
   Also we can see the distance of developing country and developed country form the advertisment, for instant,there is a lot of daily basical produt advertisment in developing country,such as towel and soap,however there is a lot of high techology prodcut advertisment of developed country ,such as mobile phone,computer.we can realise what should accelerate to develp for reducing the distance between poor and rich
   in short,advertisment is demonstration about the level of country also tell us a lot of about country,the development of country is good for form of advertisment

[ 本帖最后由 whereiswc 于 2007-9-28 16:32 编辑 ]

http://www.xiaomaguohe.net/bbs/thread-3521-1-1.html

With the economical developing the business advertisement  can not be less（用词时不是有点问题？） in our life, we can see the varieties of advertisements in TV or any media, advertisement take us more convenience also tell us a lot about a country, we can reliase（用词是不是有点问题？） culture ,history and another knowledge from that
    It is well known to us that advertisement is very less(little) in past 10 years, also there (are) a few female in the advertisement, similarly impossible to dress exposure cloth in the screen, however to our surprise that we can see more and more female in the advertisement and (they) dress exposure clothing or mini skirt to make show nowadays, just show the product of the company. They can make varies poses to attract you to believe that, from the phenomenon, it can be seen that the principle of person are changing, also the concept of entire society are changed. There will be more changes of advertisement in future with the developing country.
   Not only this aspect of advertisement, but the kind of advertisements, also can tell us a lot about situation of country. Comparing China to European and USA, there are a lot of medicine advertisements in China however a few these advertisements in European and USA. That can provide that the law in china should be change and be protected.
   Also we can see the distance of developing country and developed country form the advertisement. For instant, there is (are) a lot of daily basical (essential) product advertisements in developing country, such as towel and soap. However there is (are) a lot of high technology product advertisements of developed country, such as mobile phone, computer. We can realize what should accelerate to develop for reducing the distance between poor and rich.
   In short, advertisement is demonstration about the level of country; also tell (tells) us a lot of about country, the development of country is good for form of advertisement(这句话是什么意思？)
我水平也挺烂的,我只能看看,觉得有错的地方我改了下,要是把你对的作文改错了,你就54我把~~~~

[ 本帖最后由 whereiswc 于 2007-9-28 16:32 编辑 ]

我批过的
http://www.xiaomaguohe.net/bbs/v ... amp;page=1#pid47257
http://www.xiaomaguohe.net/bbs/v ... amp;page=1#pid47255

对不起.请54我
感觉语法错误很多
到了影响阅读的程度...
另外例子不多...
不够specific

建议楼住多练打字速度,很多不必要的错误一看就是打错的，虽然在新托中没有明文规定,但语法错误太多必然分数不会高.