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作文大讨论

本主题由 heqiongsophie 于 2008-4-9 07:26 提升

作文大讨论

我这有篇老师布置的作文,题如下,字数要求400单词,同T的独立写作部分差不多.
题目很有趣,我想作为T中一道论人的品质题也可以这样出.
如 What do you think the most important quality of a student/ a businessman/ a person is in the modern society?

我已经写了一大半了,例子和结尾写不好了        ,各位仁兄给些参考吧,(中英文皆可)
T写作------让我们共同进步!


Statement:  Joseph Epstein, a famous writer, once said, "We decide what is important and what is trivial in life. We decide so that what makes us significant is either what we do or what we refuse to do. But no matter how indifferent the universe may be to our choices and decisions, these choices and decisions are ours to make. We decide. We choose, so are our lives formed. In the end, forming our own destiny is what ambition is about."

Do you agree or disagree? What's your opinion? Give examples or details to support your idea.

我的版本是:
                                                
                                             Of Ambition
    Joseph Epstein, a famous writer, once said, "We decide what is important and what is trivial in life. We decide so that what makes us significant is either what we do or what we refuse to do. But no matter how indifferent the universe may be to our choices and decisions, these choices and decisions are ours to make. We decide. We choose, so are our lives formed. In the end, forming our own destiny is what ambition is about." Yet opinions may vary on this statement. In my opinion, I agree to Epstein's view, because we need ambition to guide a direction in our life.
     Ambition is the destiny in our own life. It is with ambition that we have confidence in doing everything no matter what we are, and what background we have. So ambition has no relation with outside surroundings, but with our innate desire. Even one who has physical deficiency will have confidence in himself if he has a life goal. The Napoleon, the greatest political and military leader in French history, never worried about his appearance shortcoming—being very short as a military commander at war. Also, the attack of poliomyelitis in 1921 made Franklin Roosevelt, the American 32nd president, permanently crippled and unable to stand or walk. However, he never lost his courage, optimism or desire for a political career. His personal struggles transformed the once supercilious young man into one of the most outgoing political figures of the century and one of the most influential and controversial US presidents. So ambition is the choice made by ourselves.
   Why do we regard ambition as something very important and necessary? If ambition is to be well regarded, the rewards of ambition---control over one’s destiny and being more competitive in the society---must be deemed worthy of the sacrifices made on ambition’ s behalf. The life experiences have weaved with our dreams that account the reason why we live. With ambition, we will be more hard working, because we know that all of our efforts will finally help inject force realizing our dream. We will optimistically confront and solve the problem with confidence, despite the reality is sometimes hard to tackle.
  Besides,... 大伙给点建议,帮我想想例子和结尾; 对上文有不同意见或评价也请指正喔:
  1.
  2.
Where there is a will, there is a way.
Classification作文版引导
5月15日作文题9

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what we are改成who we are比较好
还有为什么是once supercilious young man,罗斯福以前很自大么?


总体来说我觉得写得很好,句法和内容都很充实,非常不错,不过有点瑕疵就是ambition在文章中出现太多次,最好找个词适当的替换一下,不过我暂时还想不到合适的词,呵呵
偌大的一个论坛,北工大的校友咋那么少涅= =
在我20岁的时候, make a big difference!
几个连接(请点击):
如何复习新托福
资源下载汇总贴
加试问题及机经
08年考试时间统计专帖

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对不起~我看到你的短信了~但是我实在是水平有限~我来帮你支持一下好么~

sorry啊~!~
学术~!~!学术~!~!~!必须要学术~!~!

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我也看到你的短信了  但你看看我以前的报分 你就知道我的水平了  但我尽力看看 提点意见

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没事,大家集思广益嘛.
混沌给的这个论据挺好  a characteristic of all businessman,有例子吗??  需要details and example.

我觉得ambition有时可以理解为  ----梦想.理想, 或者人生目标 life goal,
至于毛毛说  ambition 用的太多了, 我查了金山  :aspiration 或者可以替代.
aspiration 用法如下"

A strong desire for high achievement.
建立丰功伟绩的强烈愿望
An object of such desire; an ambition.
渴望达到的目标;雄心
Where there is a will, there is a way.
Classification作文版引导
5月15日作文题9

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我把后部分写了, 看看和全文是否连贯??  我总觉得有点不连贯...
     
      In addition, people are under heavy pressure of fierce competing in the modern society, so we should have a clear job goal and working plan as soon as possible. Compared with many ordinary people, those who have great ambition are easier successful in their careers.
  这里缺例子,  大家有好的例子吗,请补上...
        


       However, being ambitious doesn’t mean that we make a goal without thinking the possibility of realization. Suppose one is very ambitious and has a dream of becoming an emperor of ancient China, the chances are that that fantasy will never come true. Thus, what kind of ambition we should have depends on the basic situation of reality, and if not, only daydream.
   
    结尾怎么结呢?
Where there is a will, there is a way.
Classification作文版引导
5月15日作文题9

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例子可以不用伟人阿,写一个你身边的人的例子也ok阿,是吧,新东方老师不是说还有xiao qiang, wang cai 么,呵呵

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收到你的信息了`我看了下`该补充的大家都补充了`我觉得还不错`呵呵
再璀璨的星空,少了你,便是寂寥...
再喧嚣的街道,少了你,也是单调......

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==先占坑
刀,是冷的
血,是凉的
只有不停的插,才能热血沸腾

nuwei备考BLOG--一战浙江教育学院>>>1.19

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佳句赏析:

The answer lies in this fact that we must discover the motivation for living.

What do we live for? We are intellectual beings. We have our own dreams.

even struggling in the fierce competing society, or we would find life is meaningless.
Where there is a will, there is a way.
Classification作文版引导
5月15日作文题9

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