大家帮忙看看8号的作文 估计能得多少分. g6 d- k$ C. x6 c$ k

4 z! x0 T6 l3 A! O# h6 A) EA trend that has existed for many years for many years is that increasing numbers of companies spend their money in advertisements. In today’s highly competitive marketplace, money wisely spent can greatly enrich company’s life. Advertisements can definitely improve their chances to for success. So I prefer to believe that companies should spend their money and time in advertisements for the following reasons.) x2 f8 l8 h. K5 k$ G

* g; \0 k5 i& I5 f* H' L6 aFirstly, consumers always do not know what they want to buy. People always have no time to select goods. The students in high school have lots of homework to do, so they have not much time to select some goods which they want to buy. Advertisements can keep the students focused on education rather than fashion. High school is the best time for students to experience a wide variety of standard subjects.
, h4 w" M. x, ^" l" c- ]; i; O  M& a  W4 w: z3 S
Secondly, advertisements can improve companies’ chances for success. Companies need to the ability to react and respond quickly to the increasingly competitive and fast changing marketplace. As new products, products lined and entire new business are added and eliminated, new jobs are created requiring new talents and skilled. Advertisements can make companies have open and good channels of communication with their employees. A part of good communication is for the boss to let the buyer know how they are doing in their job, to give on-going feedback on their performance. This is the quality of seeing the possibilities and promise of a new product, service or technology, when most companies are unable to do.
% m" y1 n# Q# h% g/ [& G9 _9 m* E( m5 c
Finally, advertisements can lead to more promising career and a higher salary. At one time I reported to the Vice President of a start-up company in the very beginning stages of testing a new technology and service. The company had many failures, and nearly disappeared several times, as most high-tech start-ups do. The Vice President persevered through several reorganization and changes in the business plan. I suggested to him that company should spend money in advertisements, then he suggested to the CEO and the CEO take my advice. After the company conquered the tough situation to success and I got this job : d* t% q4 c, P! s8 K
" L/ ^! t& Y8 r0 L# p
Last but not least, admittedly, others should argue that companies just waste money and time in advertisements. But I still think that advertisements are important for companies. Advertisements can improve their chances for success. Therefore, I hold that companies should spend money and time in advertisements." K5 v* N6 K2 @: V" b: g. o" I
& w6 C+ H$ }/ X" P$ V3 `% u; `$ G9 O
[ 本帖最后由 west 于 2007-12-17 14:32 编辑 ]

发在作文区比较好吧。。。

发在作文区没人给我回复  等2天了

没关系的   

money wisely spent can greatly enrich company’s life
1 v, G, ~: J8 L1 L, D/ O" O# Xmoney wisely spent不能当主语，enrich company’s life，company没有life，而且即使有life，也不是被丰富了
$ V+ D) Z0 P6 a# F. q) XAdvertisements can definitely improve their chances to for success    # N6 C. X6 E+ R! \% B4 k! U; s$ x; X
for success    改成 succeed4 V5 m5 k# B7 v, r2 y
keep the students focused           focusing
8 l) w3 ^; p% W1 f5 l% |3 NCompanies need to the ability        去掉to
$ @5 A  P% L& z" `7 X. }new jobs are created requiring new talents and skilled        0 z- v7 C  i3 U' E9 |9 d, z, I
这句话不太好，我觉得可以改成new jobs which require new talents and skilled  are created
7 A9 [. b) `3 T0 lI suggested to him that company should spend money in advertisements$ @3 I: ~9 b' c; c8 w9 K7 P! C
去掉to,  in 改成on
) U- x1 ^; {, e4 j) tLast but not least 改成Last but  not the least, 另外这个东西跟前面的finally重复了，让人不知道到底哪个是Last

总体映像，有些语法错误，但是不影响阅读，例子满充分的
! _, T5 t: P! y应该是4-5分的水平

有些语法错误,比如..
+ @5 x) l# [. M( G* J% [lots of homework 复数啊, 可能是笔误吧.不过很佩服你还能出了考场把你的作文记得这么清楚 $ b3 K6 R' z) x% `& E" t6 J6 Y6 R

- r$ x2 \1 B4 v6 T有些句子我看不明白.如下,是否可以说明一下....??5 A! g* A4 `1 u& W! V4 _
money wisely spent can greatly enrich company’s life.
& r. V) B: L. x0 j3 s6 V. ^As new products, products lined and entire new business are added and eliminated, new jobs are created requiring new talents and skilled.8 e- g7 }1 \: U9 b2 D

. c! O# m; A, rshould argue that 这里最好不要should,语气词委婉些好点...+ v- T! T. ~0 `8 d9 E# u
& f) \/ F7 g. r( F& C
Last but not least,用在最后一段应该还要有下个论据啊,显然你结尾了,所以用结尾连接语吧 all in all ,to sum up, in a word..
7 n; M# o5 h, r  {% d5 D# Z  y我认为下面这句挺好!# x% s0 V4 x( {: C, k0 b
to react and respond quickly to the increasingly competitive and fast changing marketplace8 a% l3 [* p" \) J: t
我认为总的说结构还可以,论据比较充实.

谢谢大家这么认真看我的作文   一定好好反思