我作文基础很不好,老师每次批改都会说基础级差...
但没几天就考试了...心里没底...不得不发上来丢人了...
字数太少...可我真是再凑不出来了,这还有点超时...
大家帮忙看下...多帮我找找问题,不胜感激!!!

题目是在大公司还是小公司的那个

People always have different opinions on whether they should work for a big company instead of working for a small company. Those people who advocate the former argue that there will be more opportunities and better welfare conditions in a big company, while those who are in favor of the latter believe that small companies can offer them more chance to do different kinds of work. I believe that it is better to work for a big company for substantial reasons.


The decisive factor I think should be pointed out at the very beginning is that only in big companies can people learn more useful skills and knowledge. The advantages of working for a big company, especially an international company do a lot of goods for people including developing the ability of oral English, learning advanced management strategies. What's more, there will be more complicated relationship in big companies because there are more sectors and employees. If we find a job in big companies, the ability of dealing with different kinds of people will develop.


No one can deny the fact that big company can offer more salary and better welfare conditions than small companies. Finding a job in big companies can makes people earn more money and have a comfortable life.

Some people argue that people should work for small companies without recognizing the benefits that the valuable experience big companies offered. People who have had a job for a big company are usually described with words as sophisticated and experienced. As a result those people are easy to find a job because employers also look favorably on applicants who have this kind of experience. For instance, applicant who has worked for IBM Corporation is more competitive than those who only have work experience in small companies.

Based on what I have discussed above, I strongly believe that we should get a job in a big company. It is the wisest decision for the present and for the future.

谢谢各位了

http://www.xiaomaguohe.net/bbs/thread-3521-1-1.html

原来还有这个要求...
我在论坛里看的求批改的作文每次都是别人说了哪错 才能看出来好像是有点读不通
真是汗

论据应该详细，加上例子更好
每段的细节和例子都应该像论据靠拢
lz要加强这方面的练习

谢谢 现在的问题就是展不开 所以导致写不够字数...

第一段还可以分: The decisive factor I think should be pointed out at the very beginning is that only in big companies can people learn more useful skills and knowledge.
      The advantages of working for a big company, especially an international company do a lot of goods for people including developing the ability of oral English, learning advanced management strategies. 这后面可以举例子啊
      What's more, there will be more complicated relationship in big companies because there are more sectors and employees. If we find a job in big companies, the ability of dealing with different kinds of people will develop. 这也可以加例子,这样字数不就多了吗

谢谢
努力编。。。

Nowadays， there is a popular social issue of whether people should work for a big company or for a small enterprise. Those who are in favor of being employed by a small business believe that small companies can offer them more chance to do different kinds of work., which are important practice. I believe that it is better to work for a big company for substantial reasons.+内容


The most significant reason is that people may get more opportunities to learn useful skills and knowledge in big companies rather than in a small one. The advantages of working for a big company, especially an international company includes improving spoken English, learning on management. What's more, there will be more complicated relationship in big companies, which may contribute to our good social skills, because there are a larger number of departments and employees. Hence, it is convenient for us to make progress in all aspects with variety of precious working experiences which small businesses lack of. 本段可加入对小公司在这方面的批驳

Moreover, big companies can offer high-level salary and even bonus at the end of a year. Obviously, it will be a huge advantage for our career and family when we can have a decent life instead of hardly making ends meet. In this case, we will more probably succeed in our career when we are in a big company as we do not have to worry about our livelihood too much..

Some people believe that they would possibly be competent after being capable of doing different kind of work in a small business; however, work experience, provided by big establishments are more useful than what we can get in small workplaces because big companies are qualified involving in difficult and profitable projects. As a result those people who once to be an office worker of a big company can quickly find a job. For instance, applicant who has worked for IBM Corporation is more competitive than those who only have work experience in a local computer company.

In conclusion, it is beneficial to work in a big company instead of in a small one as being in big company means advantageous study environment, enjoyable life and successful career.

水平不高，仅供参考，我们只是提供一个想法，楼主一定也要自己去改，很多idea 和stucture的问题也确实不是别人能改的。祝你考试成功。下面是可以显示修改的文本

[ 本帖最后由 写在心里 于 2008-1-30 10:45 编辑 ]

ls就够模版的了

I think this one is really good~~~not the one I can write~~~~~~
but, from OG I think top essays are plain