嘻嘻 狠拍狠拍 虽然写的比较痛苦 但死去后 才能活过来 所以大家救救我吧！！！！
我这个星期考  就只好再麻烦大家一次了  鞠躬鞠躬！~！~！！~！！~！~！


Some people believe that students should be given one long vacation each year. Others believe that students should have several short vacations throughout the year. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.

Students who downed in the strenuous study always go into raptures at the mere mention of the vocation. Before to starting with the vocation, we might have been made a schedule earlier for our vocation. However, due to the difference in policy of school, students have to accept different policy that one long vacation each year or several short vacation throughout the year as a result. Thus, from my personal angle alone, I will choose the former point.

First of all, have you ever had an experience that we listed a long plan about what is going to do in the vacation, such as, slimming weight, a long way journey, or a practicing chance, but these I just listed never came true, and the reason merely is that instead of a long vacation each year, we sometimes have been given several short vacation throughout the year. Consequently, I consider we should be given a long vacation and we can concentration primary energy and time on one thing which we want to come true in this vacation. Imagine as this vacation draw to a close, student will focus on their study deeply.

Moreover, we often liveunder the illusion that the time of one long vacation is more than the time of several short vacation. This is because a short vacation is not makes us to get real relax. So, in my eyes, function of the vacation is relaxing. Obviously, the fact is coincide with I just said that, the vacation is not too much mean.

Finally, when a vacation is close to us, most of us can not concentrate all energy on study. So this is disadvantage of our job. Like me, I often imagine recently which shopping mall I decide to go or which party I will be invited or which pencil eye is fit with me, when a vacation is closing to me. As a result, I often make many mistakes in the study at the time.

So, because these reason which is just listed by me, I think one long vacation is better than the several short vacation. But no matter which one you choose, we may think back a memorable moment, when the vacation comes to an end.

[ 本帖最后由 natalie 于 2008-3-10 20:50 编辑 ]

we often under the illusion
语法有问题啊，没谓语？

嘻嘻  
忘纠正语法了  
应该是we often live under the illusion

"have you ever had an experience that ..."这种问法似乎有点生硬,我看"挑战托福满分作文"那里提过,不要直接对作者提问,这样文体不正式.当然,我本人的水平很有限, 并无冒犯之心.

嘻嘻
米有米有
建议非常好！~！~！~！
鞠躬鞠躬！~！~！~！

throughout the year 出现了两次哦,可以换种说法?
but these I just listed never came true改成让步从句怎么样呀?我记得老师说米国人是比较喜欢让步句子的
So, because these reason which is just listed by me..            so和because不可以同时出现吧

1 we can concentration primary energy and time on one thing ，小错，拼写concentrate
2 This is because a short vacation is not makes us to get real relax，还是拼写吧，does和relaxation
3 Obviously, the fact is coincide with I just said that, the vacation is not too much mean.
我想这句是不是改成Obciously, the fact coincides with what I just said that the short vacation does not have too much meaning.
继续看ing

[ 本帖最后由 Shawn0311 于 2008-3-12 23:42 编辑 ]

个人愚见：
1.student will focus on their study deeply.  (change student into students)
2.So, in my eyes, function of the vacation is relaxing.(So,in my views,the function of vacation is for relaxation.)

六楼：
“So, because these reason which is just listed by me..            so和because不可以同时出现吧”
你的水平比楼主更糟糕，建议你不要发言。你的说法只成立于两个词均被用作引导分句的场合。

七楼：
“1 we can concentration primary energy and time on one thing ，小错，拼写concentrate”
何止于此！这句话最大的问题是楼主在母语干扰下误用了concentrate，非要在后边加点什么，恰是画蛇添足！

楼主：
“This is because ...”
“这是因为...”
倒是一字不差。回家重学吧。

谢谢了
我全都接受